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Heart Hickeys- Why I No Longer Have A Broken Heart

Posted On 02/26/2017

So we’re gonna talk about hickeys. (It’s not what you think)

Webster (the dictionary) says a hickey is a mark caused by a lover biting or sucking the skin. I like to think that hickeys are a visible representation of the love that you and someone share. Even when that person isn’t there, the hickey is a reminder of that moment you shared with that special person. After some research, I found that the most common way to get rid of a hickey is to rub ice on it. Some people may want to get rid of it immediately, while others might just let it naturally go away. It’s kind of like a temporary tattoo.

I’m not really big on dating because it usually ends up with me getting my feelings hurt. However, I recently decided to give this guy the time of day. It wasn’t perfect, but I really did invest as much as I could into whatever it was that we had. I didn’t drop everything I was going to spend every moment with him. To him, that meant I wasn’t invested enough. I guess he wanted to play house, but the idea of playing house with someone I’d only known for a few months wasn’t okay with me.

One day this dude sent me a text telling me that he could no longer see me because he was busy trying to pursue someone else. (I think it’s important for me to mention that this was also my last day as a teacher so I was dealing with a lot of emotions that day already.) He had the nerve to tell me that I was pushing him away, but I would text him every day and I would try to talk to him on the phone. I was angry, hurt, and totally caught off guard by it. After it was over, I would pick up my phone to try to call him because I wanted to share whatever good news I had with him, but then I remembered that I deleted his number. That feeling lasted for a few weeks, but it passed. I’ve moved on, not to another person, but I moved into a new season in my life. If I’m being honest, he wouldn’t fit into my current state of life anyways. Funny enough, he actually sent me a text the other day and I felt no need to engage in conversation with him. Sure the idea of punching him in his kneecaps crosses my mind sometimes, but I let it go.

So what does that have to do with hickeys? I’m getting to that, I promise.

I think it’s safe to say we’ve all experienced a failed relationship at some point in our lives. A relationship we thought would last forever, but it ended. Even though the relationship ended, the love you had for that person lingered. After experiencing heartbreak, I notice a lot of people tend to ice their hearts so they can prove that we aren’t bothered by the fact that we’re hurt by the end of a relationship. We blast Beyoncé or Adele (and if they cheated we, throw in a little Carrie Underwood or Jazmine Sullivan) and we make those songs our anthem even though deep down we still wish we were still with that person. We put up a good front, at least I know I do. However, as each day passes, our memory of them fades away naturally. The rate at which it fades is different for everybody.

I no longer experience heartbreaks, I experience heart hickeys. At some point, my heart enjoyed the process of getting the hickeys. When the fun was over, they were gone, but I still took the memories of them with me everywhere. At some point, my memories of that person were no longer there and it’s almost as if they never existed. My heart was beating exactly the same as it was before.

Your heartbreak isn’t a tattoo or a scar. The feeling will go away and the memories will fade away.

 Just like a hickey.

-Kymmie

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  • Ashleigh hitter 02/27/2017 at 3:04 AM

    Great blog post kymmie

    You may enjoy my blog about “checking out of the heartbreak hotel”

    https://ashleighhitter.co.uk/2016/10/30/checking-out-of-the-heartbreak-hotel/

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