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Articles posted by Kymmie (Page 2)

Kymmie

  • Relationships
    BY:

    Dear Single People, It’s Okay to Want a Relationship.

    Posted On 02/11/2018

    I’m a perpetually single woman. I’m almost 25 years old and I’ve never been in a relationship.  I’ve had a few 3 week (or less) boyfriends in high school, but I don’t count that. College would have been the perfect opportunity to date, but I went to a woman’s college and I never really did anything social outside of school. So my options were to date someone’s dad, someone’s brother or a professor; none of which were viable or smart options.

    Within the past 14 months,  I’ve started to actively date and I can say that my love life, or lack thereof, is a hot mess. One guy dumped me for another girl because he “really liked her”. One guy led me on and lied to me. One guy ghosted me TWICE. I’m currently dealing with the aftermath of being involved with a narcissist. Not to mention the few times I’ve sat at a restaurant waiting for a guy to show up. Only to realize after 30 minutes of unanswered text messages and a few missed calls that he wasn’t coming. Or the times I was hit with the “you’re great, but I’m not looking for a relationship” line.

    I see a lot of my friends boo’d and bae’d up and I can barely get a text/call back or a second date. With all of my unsuccessful attempts, it’s easy for me to start thinking “what’s wrong with me?” In fact, someone actually told me that I needed to reflect on my actions because apparently, I’m not doing something right. I’m all for honest self-reflection. Trust me, every time something in my life goes south, I think about what went wrong and how I contributed to the situation. What I realized is that the actions of the guys I’ve talked to or dated had nothing to do with me. Their actions were a reflection of their character, not mine. 

    —

    The worst part of being single is having to deal with the opinions and pressure of others. It’s annoying when I have a casual conversation or a friendship with a guy and everyone is trying to make us a couple. It’s also frustrating because I feel like I have to put up this “I don’t want or need a man” front or I have to prove that I’m happy with being single. Or I have to have some deep explanation as to why I’m single. FYI: I’m single because I don’t have a boyfriend. And the minute I say anything about being single, BAM, I instantly get one of these cliche responses:

    “The right person is out there, you just have to be patient”

    “You have to be comfortable being alone before you can be comfortable with being with someone else”

    “Just take this time to work on yourself” (Like do I stop working on myself when I get in a relationship? #AskingForAFriend)

    And my personal favorite:

    “You have to go through your bozos before you get to your Boaz”

    While all of that may be true to some extent, I’m tired of hearing it. We show support and compassion to people in a variety of situations. But SINGLE PEOPLE? We get ignored and classified as bitter, desperate, unhappy and lonely. No one really takes the time to listen to us our wants and desires, objectively.

    Being single doesn’t bother me. If it did, I’d still be chasing after guys that were no good for me. I’m a strong and independent woman and I have no problem with admitting that I WANT A RELATIONSHIP. That doesn’t mean I want a relationship with the next guy I meet or that I’m in a rush to get married. I don’t  want a relationship just to say I’m in a relationship and post pictures of my boyfriend an I all over social media. My life is pretty cool the way that it is. I’m simply looking for someone to compliment my life, not to complete it. 

    —

    In the age of swiping right, sliding in DMs, Netflix and chill, and every guy thinking he’s a good guy simply because he has a car, a job, and a house/apartment, dating sucks. At times, I feel like sitting at home for the rest of my life with my bonnet on and binge watch How I Met Your Mother because I feel like Ted Mosby understands me. At least I wouldn’t have to deal with the rejection, the lies and the disappointment that comes along with dating. Right?

    WRONG.Through all of my single woman struggles, I’m still a hopeless romantic. I’m still willing to get to know someone even though it might not turn into anything more. I’m willing to shoot my shot (oh how I hate that phrase), even though I might miss. I know that one day I’ll marry the man of my dreams and we will have beautiful children. Until then, I’ll continue living my life,  planning my wedding on Pinterest, and picking out baby names. 

    —

    My letter to single people

    Dear single people,
    You deserve to love and be loved.
    Having a desire for companionship doesn’t mean you’re lonely.
    Moving quickly from one person to the next doesn’t make you a hoe.
    Getting dumped or ghosted doesn’t mean you’re flawed.
    Having your feelings hurt doesn’t make you weak.
    Wanting a healthy and lasting relationship doesn’t mean you’re desperate.
    It just means you’re HUMAN!
    To all of the single people reading this, it’s okay to want a relationship.

    -Kymmie

    PS: Make it to Me by Sam Smith is the perfect song for single people! 

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  • Self Reflection
    BY:

    Simply Kymtastic turns ONE! A Recap of my First Year of Blogging

    Posted On 01/15/2018

     

    Woah… I’m a blogger. I’d never thought I’d say that.

    It’s been a year since I’ve launched simplykymtastic.com and all I can say is WOW.

    The Journey

    Most people I know have a hobby. A year ago, I didn’t. Sure there were activities that I liked, but I didn’t do any of those activities consistently. I was always so focused on school or work that I didn’t take time for ME.

    I’ve never considered myself to be a writer. I’d write for school, I’d write for work, but I never wrote for fun. Every once in awhile, I’d write a really deep Facebook post and I would have a few people share my post or comment/inbox me to tell me that they appreciated my thoughts. After having a conversation with my mom, she told me I should really look into starting a blog.

    I ultimately decided to launch my blog because I was going through a time of change. I didn’t know where I was headed or what was going to happen to me. I decided to invest in something that I would have for many years to come, regardless of where life took me.

    Half of the battle was taking the time to start a blog. I’ve started a few free websites in the past, but I never posted on them. I didn’t take it seriously and I didn’t want to put in the work. Since I’d just quit my job, I suddenly had an abundance of free time.  When I made the decision to start my blog, I didn’t know what I wanted to write about. I didn’t have a plan. I simply wanted to have an outlet.

    My blog is now my hobby!

    The Launch

    I purchased my domain name January 2nd and I launched January 15th. I worked my booty off to in the two-week time frame that I gave myself to make sure my blog was presentable. I set up a new Instagram account, I played around with my (awful) theme, and I learned as much as I could from the Facebook blogging groups that I joined.

    Naturally, new bloggers have that “What am I going to write about?” or “Will people actually read my blog?” thought process. I changed my first blog post several times. I was afraid to talk about why I quit teaching, but I felt it was necessary. Prior to launching my blog, only a handful of people knew that I had quit my job. That blog post was me sharing one of the most traumatic times in my life for the first time; not only with people that knew me but with the world. I faced some backlash for my post, but the amount of support I received was overwhelming.

    To my surprise, my first blog post has received over 5,100 views in the past year. Most of my views happened within the first two days of me launching my blog. I’ll admit, none of my other posts, have received that much attention. At the end of the day, I’m not worried about how many people read my blog. I’m more concerned about inspiring others through my stories.

    The Foundation

    I spent the majority of my first year learning as much as I could about what it means to be a blogger and how to make simplykymtastic.com the best that it could be. Running a blog isn’t easy and it’s a lot of work, but I’ve accomplished more than I could have ever imagined.  In the past year, I’ve published 28 blog posts. I found a mentor to help me grow as a writer. I was interviewed by another blogger. I changed the design of my blog (my site really was looking a little jank). Lastly, I’ve found some amazing bloggers to support and gain insight and inspiration from.

    It’s easy to get caught up in what other people are doing and try to change who you are to keep up with others. I never believed in trying to be like others in my real life, so my blogging persona shouldn’t be any different. I’m not Instagram perfect. I don’t have hundreds of thousands of followers.  I don’t have thousands of page views each day (or month). I’m not raking in hundreds of dollars monthly. I’m not here for all of the hype. I’m not here for the fast train to six figures. I’m already making six figures every month if you count the two numbers to the right the decimal. I just want to stay true to myself and the success will come naturally.

    The Next Level

    So what’s next for simplykymtastic.com? Honestly, I don’t know. I wish I had some big plan to unveil, but I don’t. Having a creative spirit is kinda hard sometimes because not everyone can see or understand where I’m trying to go. And it’s hard for me to articulate my vision as it is always evolving. It’s frustrating sometimes because I have so many ideas floating around in my head.  I have goals and I’m sorting through all of my ideas to find a way to make them work. I believe I can do anything, but I can’t do everything (at least not all at the same time). 

    Where will year two take me? God only knows. I do know for certain that it will be SIMPLY KYMTASTIC.

    If you’re reading this, I really do thank you,

    -Kymmie

     

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  • Life Advice Self Reflection
    BY:

    The Importance of Aligning your Habits, Goals, and Intentions

    Posted On 01/07/2018

    Habits?  Goals? Intentions?

    Is there a difference? YES! Do I want to spend my time explaining the difference? ABSOLUTELY NOT! Here’s my brief interpretation.

    Intentions: The why behind your goals and the feelings associated with the process of achieving your goals

    Goals: Long-term results (tangible, measurable)

    Habits: Daily routines that influence your ability to achieve your goals and intentions

    Now that I’ve explained the difference, here are my intentions, goals, and habits for 2018.

    My intentions for 2018

    My word for 2018 is INTENTION. I want every decision I make to relate to my intentions in some way.

    • I will serve God.
    • I will be happy
    • I will be successful
    • I will be educated
    • I will love myself
    • I will be healthy
    • I will have quality/healthy/meaningful friendships
    • I will be relaxed
    • I will be wealthier
    • I will be creative
    • I will be SIMPLY KYMTASTIC

    My goals for 2018

    Rome wasn’t built in a day, so I’m not trying to build my whole empire in 2018. This is simply the foundation.

    • I will lose 20 pounds
    • I will post three blog posts a month.
    • I will read six books.
    • I will attend one social/networking event a month
    • I will develop my business plan
    • I will secure two freelance gigs or guest posts
    • I will create one stream of supplemental income

    My Habits for 2018

    Starting today, I will be participating in the 7 Virtues Challenge along with a few lovely ladies from the See Jane Write community. It takes 21 days to form a habit and hopefully at the end of the next 21 days,  I will have a routine formed.  Below are 7 habits I would like to form and an brief explanation for each.

    I will wake up at 5 am.

    I’m a teacher so early mornings aren’t that far-fetched for me. I currently wake up a 6:30 and somedays I may not even get out of bed until 7. By waking up earlier, I can write, check emails, cook breakfast, exercise, or meditate. Adding an extra hour and a half to my day will increase my productivity.

    I will get 7 hours of sleep each night.

    Sleep is important to me, but sleep is also a struggle for me. My main issue with sleep is that I have a hard time turning my brain off. I’m up thinking about ideas and what I’m going to do the next day. I will need sleep in order to have enough energy to make it through each day, especially since I’m waking up at 5am.

    I will drink at least 64 ounces of WATER.

    I’ve purchased a 64-ounce water bottle to get me started and that’s working pretty well. I love water, but I also love juice and soda. I’ve gone without soda before, however, I’ve slipped back into drinking soda almost every day. I have not had a sip of soda in 2018 and I don’t miss it. As far as juice goes, I’ll limit my intake.

    I will read at least one chapter in my book.

    My mentor Javacia always says that good writers read good writing. I’m a high school reading interventionist so naturally reading is a large part of my day. I also spend time reading for information when it comes to blogging. Reading for fun and enlightenment should be incorporated into my everyday life.

    I will write.

    I’ll admit, I don’t like to write (but I have a blog. Go figure)  Most of my blog posts are written the day before they are posted. If I write daily, I’ll have more time to refine my writing before it’s published. I also have a few journals that I plan to use to help me express my creative side.

    I will eat 3 BALANCED meals.

    This will probably be the hardest for me because I have a love-hate relationship with food.

    Some days I eat 3 meals, some days I only eat once and it might not be anything substantial.  Part of it is that I don’t take the time to plan what I eat and the other part is that I don’t like to cook. I WILL plan my meals ahead of time and make better choices if I choose to eat out.  I’ve become more mindful of what I eat, but I still have a long way to go.

    I will work out for 30 minutes.

    I don’t mind exercise. I just don’t make time in my day for it. Once I build up my stamina again and I’ll be fine.

    Bouns: I will limit my social media use.

    This habit came about when I lived in the mountains for two months last summer with limited cell phone service. It carried over into my everyday life. This is a little more tricky because the way that I use social media has changed over the past year. I found that by deleting the Facebook app off of my phone, I’m less likely to check my phone in general. Instagram, Snapchat, and Twitter are a different story because using those sites on anything other than a phone isn’t a feasible option. This is more about limitation than elimination. I can spend my time working on my other habits instead of scrolling through my news feed.

    Your goals, intentions, and habits have to be in alignment

    Goals, intentions, and habits all rely on each other.

    For example, I can say I want to lose 20 pounds, but if I don’t eat properly, rest, or work out consistently, it won’t happen. If I work out, drink more water, and eat balanced meals, I’ll be healthier. I’ll also happier because I won’t be sick as much. If I’m not sick, I won’t have to spend money at the doctor or on medication.  As a result, I’ll be wealthier. It’s a domino effect.

    Your intentions should drive your goals and your habits should create a lifestyle that is conducive for your intentions and goals to manifest.

    2018 is not just about making empty resolutions, it’s about a lifestyle change. I’m taking the momentum from 2017 to make this year Simply Kymtastic.

    Final Thought:

    DO or DO NOT, there is no try. -Yoda

    What are your intentions for 2018? What goals do you have set for yourself? What habits do you want to form? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.

     

    To follow my journey through the 7 virtues challenge, check out my Instagram. I’ll be posting daily updates.

    I’ll share my recap of my 7 Virtues Challenge January 28th. Subscribe to my blog to receive updates on my next blog posts.

    Are you struggling with goal setting? Check out my Slay Your Goals Planner review.

    Photo by Ross Findon on Unsplash.

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  • Self Reflection
    BY:

    I Don’t Have a New Year’s Resolution for 2018… and that’s okay

    Posted On 12/09/2017

    Tis the season to be jolly and to everyone figuring sharing why 2018 will be their year. My newsfeeds and timelines are filled with my internet friend’s personal highlights the lowlights and everything in between from 2017. On the flip side, I see a number of New Year’s Resolution posts. I enjoy seeing the excitement of others as they make these declarations for what they want in 2018. As I read the posts, I can’t help but think, “shouldn’t I already know what I want out of 2018?” The truth is,  I don’t know. I’ve always been the person that enjoys having a plan A, B and C. I like having everything mapped out and dates set in stone. 2017 was the first year I didn’t have anything planned. I just knew I needed a new job and everything else would fall into place around that.

    And it did.

    While sitting at home in my unemployment,  I decided I wanted to start a blog. I researched how to go about starting a blog and I purchase my domain name on the same day. 13 days later, I launched simplykymtastic.com. I had no idea what I was doing, no long-term plan, and I didn’t know if I would even be good at it. It’s almost a year later and  I’ve developed a blogging support system filled with my friends and family, I’m in a number of Facebook communities for bloggers and entrepreneurs and I’m working with an AMAZING writing coach. None of this was premeditated. As a result, 2017 was probably the best year of my life. 2017 was far from perfect, but it was the first time I felt like I really lived my life without caring so much. SideNote: I did find a new job. 

    Do I have goals? Yes! Do I have a plan to meet my goals? Absolutely! I use my vision boards and my Slay Your Goals Planner to help me stay accountable.   EVERY DAY is a great day to make something happen. January 1st shouldn’t be the only day I feel compelled to start over, cut someone out of my life or kick a bad habit. I can’t confidently say that I’ll have a renewed sense of mind and all of the setbacks and obstacles that happened to me in 2017 will just magically leave my memory when the clock strikes midnight. Nor do I believe that my life will be drastically different in 2018. I want 2018 to be 2017: The Sequel. Not because 2017 was perfect (Trust me, IT WASN’T), but I’ve learned so much this year and I don’t believe I should interrupt this path I’m on. I’m still learning more about myself and I like the direction I’m going in.

    I’m not anti-New Year’s Resolutions, but creating a New Year’s Resolution isn’t right for me; not this year.

    I don’t know what new adventures 2018 will bring, but I do know that it will be SIMPLY KYMTASTIC!

    -Kymmie

    What’s your attitude towards New Year’s Resolutions? I’d love it if you shared your thoughts below in the comments.

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